Reviews for
Having Your Baby Through Egg Donation
Clinical social worker specializing in adoption, parenting, and fertility-related issues Ellen Glazer and certified health education specialist Evelina Sterling present Having Your Baby Through Egg Donation, a thoroughly practical and informative guide that provides, in lay terms, everything prospective parents need to know about using modern technology to create children through donated eggs. Chapters address the circumstances in which egg donation is an option; the laws, rules, and ethics for recruited-donor programs; common emotional issues and problems associated specifically with a pregnancy from egg donation; issues to deal with during parenthood of a child conceived through egg donation; and much more. A list of organizations and on-line resources rounds out this valuable, absolute “must-read” for anyone considering participation in an egg donor program or becoming parents through such a practice.
Betsy L. Hogan
Midwest Book Review, August, 2005
The following starred (=highly recommended) review appeared in Library Journal’s April 15, 2005 edition…For many infertile women who want to become pregnant, the only option is to use the eggs of a fertile donor. Glazer, a clinical social worker and infertility coach, and Sterling, a public health consultant, have teamed up to produce an exhaustive guide for anyone considering egg donation. This is not a clinical how-to book; the authors instead focus on “the psycho-social ramifications of having and parenting a baby using the ova of a donor.” After briefly surveying the history of egg donation and the medical process involved, Glazer and Sterling discuss in depth finding and selecting a donor and egg donor programs; case studies provide a personal view of how couples and individuals make the decision. Ethical, legal, economic, and religious considerations, including the roles of lawyers and mental health counselors,are addressed in detail. Also well covered are tips on how to share this information with the family and talk with children born through egg donation. A list of resources and references rounds out the text. This excellent resource is highly recommended for most consumer health collections.Judith Janes
Cleveland Clinic Foundation Library
Cleveland, Ohio
The good news is that this is a wonderful book for all of us to read and to share. The bad news is that if your patients read it before you do, they may cancel their appointment with you, feeling like they now know everything about this subject!I have been reading and referring to this book since Ireceived my copy. It is very comprehensive and covers most every topic any of my patients has brought up in session. Ellen S. Glazer and Evelina W. Sterling have brought together in one place the information we have been sharing with our patients since we as professionals were first asked to meet with recipient couples.The book is written in short, subject discussion style. The authors have made it easy for anyone to browse the book, pick out the topics they are interested in and turn to that information. The book has addressed the issue of egg donation from beginning to end. Starting with the subjects of decision making regarding egg donation, choosing a donor program and choosing a donor, the book continues to walk the reader through the entire scope of issues including legal, moral and ethical questions, grief and loss as part of this and special family situations such as gay and lesbian couples. Pregnancy with donated eggs and parenthood after egg donation are also included as subjects for review. The scope of this book is all-encompassing and serves as a great comfort to those who are eager to learn all they can about this family-building option.
The amount of information presented is a wonderful beginning in anticipation of meeting with the trained professional. If the couple would read this book in preparation for their visit, they would have a good foundation to begin an in-depth discussion of their decision-making choices. The authors have shared early in the book that their bias is towards the importance of truth telling. Even the word disclosure, they write, implies that there is a secret at the outset of the process that may or not be shared. Honesty about this decision comes from the confidence gained regarding this choice for their family, and that is a good thing to be shared and spoken about with children.
For those individuals or couples that may not agree with this, my hunch is that the encouraging tone of the book and the couples presented in the cases who are happy with this choice for themselves, will help the unsure couples consider egg donation as a positive choice and embrace it openly and honestly as one way to build their family.
When egg donation is first presented as an option to an individual or couple, the questions, the fears and the fantasies flood one’s being. Having this book to read can serve as a great comfort to someone wanting to sort out and understand this new, maybe previously unheard of, reproductive technology.
One of my favorite chapters was “What You Can Do to Prepare Emotionally.” Ambivalence is the first line item in this chapter. How might it ease a woman’s or a man’s mind to be reassured that this feeling, along with the many others, is normal and need not mean that egg donation is out of the question for them because of these feelings?
I think that as individuals and couples are struggling to create their family and deal with their fertility challenges, they will refer to this book over and over to clarify the issues and help them stay on the task of moving forward with their plans to have their family.
I can picture one family member presenting this book to other family members in hopes of raising awareness of the issues. If family members are considering coming together as donors and couples, this would be important to read and discuss.
Similarly, reproductive professionals such as physicians, nurses and administrators of the paperwork would be wise to read this along with mental health professionals to increase their knowledge and understanding of all the issues that need to be addressed before one can move ahead with egg donation from a position of informed consent.
It is a grand achievement to address the entire range of psychological, legal, practical, financial and relational nuances of egg donation as a family-building choice. Because there are so many topics and sub-headings, one must not expect to have a totally in depth discussion of all of the issues. For example, grief, loss and mourning receive only limited attention. Do we say that’s inadequate? I would say that what is most important is that the significance of these feelings has been addressed and acknowledged to the reader. We would hope they could use this to further their work and discussion around these core issues.
I am thankful for this book and refer it often to prospective parents before or during consultations. It has been well received, and I expect it to be an important part of our shared literature on this subject. It is valuable in the concrete, comprehensive way it outlines and addresses the collective knowledge about egg donation that we have to this point. I expect it to pave the way for many individuals and couples to experience creating their families with confidence and joy.
Ellen Speyer, MFT
reviewed in the Summer, 2005 edition of
American Society of Reproductive Medicine’s
“Mental Health Professional Group Newsletter”
This is a must read book for anyone considering or currently undergoing fertility treatment with egg donation. Glazer and Sterling have put the information together in an easy to read format; lacking pictures and colour but with many different case studies which bring the book to life.The book is written as if for complete beginners to the world of infertility, the layout functional and it proved to be a very easy & informative read. It explores many issues both emotional and ethical from every perspective, leaving me thinking and wanting to find out more.The book went further than many by not only looking at the history behind egg donation, current attitudes which surprisingly vary so much around the world, but also looking far in to the future to issues in later life for both the children born as a result of egg donation and their parents.
The book ends with an excellent list of resources and suggested further reading. If the authors think other books are worth reading after going through their book, which will become a bible to many women, then I’m off to the library to reserve the entire list!
Tracey Sainsbury.
Regional Organiser, Infertility Network UK
London, UK
Glazer and Sterling wisely tackle the ever present quagmires of third
party reproduction with far-reaching insight and integrity. This book
offers a fresh and innovative perspective where both donors and recipients
are honored and respected. A must read for anyone considering egg
donation.Elaine Gordon Ph.D.
Psychologist, Private Practice
California
Having Your Baby through Egg Donation is an indispensable resource for all parties involved in reproductive medicine: married couples, single individuals, gay and lesbian couples; donors and gestational carriers; medical personnel; and friends and family who need to understand and provide support to all considering and/or choosing egg donation as a means of creating their families.Its examination of the multiple and complex issues that are a part of both anonymous and known egg donation is thorough and includes the psychological, medical, legal, and ethical concerns of this process. Even an interesting history of egg donation is included as well as the various ways it is practiced in other parts of the world.
A very important theme in this book is the need for all of us �to think outside the box� as we examine egg donation and to remember that “reproductive medicine is a changing field.” The personal stories within its pages help the readers to understand the tangible losses that precede the use of egg donation. Congratulations to Ellen Glazer and Evelina Sterling on their accomplishment.Patricia Mahlstedt, Ed.D
Psychologist, Private Practice
Houston, Texas
At long last there is a comprehensive guide for those considering ovum donation. This amazing book, chocked full of information and resources, covers the medical, ethical and psychological aspects of this family building option more completely than anything previously available.Beginning with helping an individual or couple to make the decision to use donor eggs, the authors take the reader on a journey through every aspect of this choice. It includes who to share the information with, how much it will cost, how to proceed with the legal contracts, how to talk with kids and the importance of resolving infertility before moving on. This book portrays families created through ovum donation in the positive light it deserves, reminding readers that our families are joyous, honest and grateful and very much like all families, but with a difference. I will definitely be recommending this book to all my clients who are considering pursuing ovum donation as a path to parenthood.
Carole LieberWilkins, M.A.
Marriage and Family Therapist
Los Angeles
Having Your Baby Through Egg Donation is the first book that offers a thorough exploration and discussion of the major issues relevant to individuals and couples considering egg donation. In very basic language and terminology, Glazer and Sterling guide the reader through the maze of feelings and considerations. Using a tremendous amount of empathy and support, the authors offer the first real support in print for potential egg donor recipients. This book is a “must have” for those beginning the journey of egg donation.Andrea Mechanick Braverman, Ph.D.
Director of Psychological Services
Pennsylvania Reproductive Associates of the Women’s Institute
Evelina Sterling and Ellen Glazer have provided a comprehensive, to-the-point treatment of egg donation, one of the most recently developed technologies in reproductive medicine. The issues covered in this nicely arranged volume range from the technical to the philosophical, providing a matter-of-fact assessment of the procedures involved in the use of donor eggs and the interactions associated with them. Every aspect of egg donation is covered with clarity and precision with illustrative vignettes highlighting true to life situations associated with donor egg use. This volume will find a welcome place in the lives of infertile couples as they are asked to consider donor egg procedures as a treatment option. Such issues as who should consider egg donation, what factors affect the decision making process, evaluation of programs offering the service, the role of lawyers and counselors, and ethical and religious concerns are considered in detail and each is placed in balanced perspective. Clinics which offer this service will find Having Your Baby through Egg Donation a useful adjuvant in day to day patient management. It is factual and humane and a must read for the myriad of professionals who have focused their efforts on application and refinement of ovum donation procedures.Luigi Mastroianni, Jr., M.D.
The William Goodell Professor of Obstetrics and Gynecology
University of Pennsylvania Medical Center
This is an important event. At last we have all in one place a book that addresses the emotions, ethics, psychology and practical tasks faced by any woman (and her partner) contemplating building a family with the help of egg donation and then raising those children.Ellen and Evelina write from long experience of supporting families using donated gametes. They clearly listen to what people say and the book is full of lively case studies illustrating the varied situations and feelings of individuals and families. Although they recognise and respect difference, they also give clear guidance, for instance about the importance of openness with children, when they believe the issue is a key one.
Although there are parts of this book that are not relevant for the UK reader, all the ethical and emotional issues are familiar and addressed in depth. Indeed there are some assumptions and practices that challenge current thinking in the UK and provide a fresh perspective. I will be very happy to recommend this book to our members.
Olivia Montuschi
Founder/Member Donor Conception Network UK
Mother of two donor-conceived young people
This valuable book draws out the range of issues to be faced by anyone involved with egg donation. Even when raising ethical controversies and medical challenges, the authors offer an optimistic and reassuring view.Carol Frost, LICSW
co-author of Helping the Stork
Infertility Counselor in Woburn, MA.
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